Saturday, 21 May 2016

How Building your self confidence can make you succeed in life

Self-confidence is a very important aspect of our lives, especially in the pursuit of success. Many struggle in vain to have it but fail to attain it because they fail to realize that it is a rare skill that needs to be learnt over time with training. Yet people who lack self-confidence can find it difficult to become successful. People who are self-confident inspire confidence in others-their colleagues, friends pers, bosses, and even their customers or clients. Gaining the confidence of others is one of the key ways in which a self-confident person attains success.

How then can we build a balance self-confidence?

It is like going on a journey based on a firm appreciation of reality that is confidence founded on real solid achievement that no one can take from you. Here is a three step approach.

Step 1: Preparing for your Journey
Get yourself ready for the journey to self-confidence by taking stock of where you are at the moment, think about where you want to go, get yourself in the right mindset for the journey, commit yourself to starting it, and stay with it.

Therefore take the following five important actions.

1. Look at your achievements so far in life: List them in what you may call “Achievement Log”. These achievements can be building your residential house, obtaining higher academic qualifications, getting a well-paid job, getting married, and promotion in your job, having a new born baby after many years of miscarriages, among others. Look at the Log often and relish them, spending a few minutes each week to enjoy the success you have achieved.

2. Think about your strengths: What makes you thick as a person? Is it the streams of income you enjoy from your investments? Is it the social support from friends and relations? Your educational level? Your skill? Your networking ability? What do you think your friends consider as your strengths and weaknesses? Spend time to reflect on what you consider to be your strengths. Thereafter, think about the opportunities available to you in all these as well as the threats you face. Threats can come, for example, from government change in policy, like withdrawal of petrol subsidy which can impact your disposable income; Robbery, kidnapping involving payment of huge ransom and so on. List them all in writing.

3. Think about what is important to you and where you go: Here is important that you think seriously about those important things you want to achieve in your life. Plan for them by setting goals and targets. Monitor your performance to see whether you are on the right track and make necessary corrections as you move on. That means you should set your goals that exploit your strengths minimize your weakness, realize your opportunities and control the threats you face.

Having set your goals in your life, you state each step towards the realization of each goal. It is advisable to take small incremental step at a time.

4. Start managing your mind: At this time of managing your mind. You need to eliminate all forms of negative self-talk capable of destroying your self-confidence. Learn how to do this from chapter 6 on rational positive thinking and the chapter on imagery which will teach you how to develop proper mental adjustment away from negative thinking to positive thinking and will make greater goals see achievable.

5. Commit yourself to success: In the final part of your preparation for the journey, you need to resolve to commit yourself unequivocally to the journey with the determination to make the journey a huge success.

If doubts crop up as you are doing this, write them down and subject them to a thorough examination through rational thinking. If they disappear after such scrutiny, then there is no cause to worry. However if they remain genuine risks, you need to set up additional goal to manage the risks. 

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